1 00:00:11,330 --> 00:00:12,091 Where am I taking you? 2 00:00:12,091 --> 00:00:14,092 Oh yeah, I gotta get some place. 3 00:00:15,053 --> 00:00:16,494 It's my sister's place. 4 00:00:16,494 --> 00:00:19,296 She was supposed to take me up but she's... kind of all there, you know. 5 00:00:24,941 --> 00:00:25,421 The address? 6 00:00:27,343 --> 00:00:28,503 Right, right, right. 7 00:00:28,503 --> 00:00:30,145 So you're here visiting family? 8 00:00:30,145 --> 00:00:31,386 Well, no, I'm an actor. 9 00:00:31,386 --> 00:00:32,146 I've been in New York 10 00:00:32,226 --> 00:00:34,468 but I got an offer to work in L.A. and 11 00:00:34,548 --> 00:00:36,270 I think it's time for me to take my shot. 12 00:00:36,270 --> 00:00:37,511 Kind of scary, I mean... 13 00:00:37,631 --> 00:00:40,993 I left my whole life behind but I think it's a smart move, you know, 14 00:00:40,993 --> 00:00:43,675 if you wanna make it as an actor, you gotta move to L.A., to Hollywood ! 15 00:00:44,916 --> 00:00:46,237 So what are you doing here in Dallas ? 16 00:00:51,922 --> 00:00:53,843 I did have a lay over in Dallas ! 17 00:00:55,000 --> 00:01:01,074 Everyone is intimidated by a shark. Become a Card Shark AMERICASCARDROOM.COM 18 00:01:36,637 --> 00:01:37,598 Oh thank God ! 19 00:01:38,679 --> 00:01:40,680 Oh my God, Joey ! 20 00:01:40,760 --> 00:01:42,121 Hey Gina ! 21 00:01:43,082 --> 00:01:44,403 My brother, the star. 22 00:01:44,403 --> 00:01:45,844 Days Of Our Lives ! 23 00:01:45,844 --> 00:01:47,606 - Not any more ! - Formerly ! 24 00:01:48,086 --> 00:01:51,529 - Good to see you. - I know, I missed you so much. 25 00:01:52,850 --> 00:01:54,411 Wait a second, wait a second ! 26 00:01:54,971 --> 00:01:55,852 You look different ! 27 00:01:55,852 --> 00:01:57,293 I forgot ! You haven't seen 'em. 28 00:02:00,536 --> 00:02:02,177 What do you think ? They're new ! 29 00:02:02,257 --> 00:02:05,419 I went up 3 cup sizes. The doctor was reluctant ! 30 00:02:06,380 --> 00:02:07,341 Come on, touch 'em. 31 00:02:07,661 --> 00:02:10,704 Let's get my bag. I'll feel you up in the car, I promise. 32 00:02:12,945 --> 00:02:14,467 Tell me about the big new job. 33 00:02:14,667 --> 00:02:17,429 It all started when I got this new agent. 34 00:02:17,549 --> 00:02:19,150 This lady is a shark. 35 00:02:19,270 --> 00:02:22,153 And that means she's a good agent, not an actual shark. 36 00:02:23,674 --> 00:02:24,234 I know that. 37 00:02:25,195 --> 00:02:26,076 Yeah, I did too. 38 00:02:27,517 --> 00:02:29,999 Anyway, she got me offers from 2 new shows. 39 00:02:30,199 --> 00:02:31,640 Wow ! What are they ? 40 00:02:31,640 --> 00:02:34,322 Well, the first one is about a bunch of male nurses 41 00:02:34,322 --> 00:02:35,883 and I wasn't really crazy about that one. 42 00:02:35,883 --> 00:02:37,284 I mean I've already been a brain surgeon. 43 00:02:37,685 --> 00:02:40,007 I don't think my fans would buy me as a nurse. 44 00:02:41,328 --> 00:02:43,730 They bought you as a brain surgeon, they're pretty understanding. 45 00:02:45,371 --> 00:02:47,292 Doesn't matter, okay ? Because the other show... 46 00:02:47,292 --> 00:02:49,214 it's about a cop and I'm the star. 47 00:02:49,494 --> 00:02:51,496 Also, it's for cable 48 00:02:51,616 --> 00:02:54,858 so there's a combination of nudity and swearing that I find intriguing. 49 00:02:56,419 --> 00:02:58,021 I am so proud of you ! 50 00:03:00,743 --> 00:03:01,664 So, how many bags we're looking for ? 51 00:03:01,864 --> 00:03:04,386 Just one, the rest of my stuff is on a moving truck 52 00:03:04,386 --> 00:03:06,948 and I gave them your number, the company's called "Movers and Shakers". 53 00:03:07,068 --> 00:03:08,869 They cost a little more but... 54 00:03:09,630 --> 00:03:10,991 that name cracks me up. 55 00:03:11,671 --> 00:03:13,113 Oh wait, that was my bag. 56 00:03:13,193 --> 00:03:14,554 It's okay, hold on. 57 00:03:15,034 --> 00:03:17,596 Sir, could you grab that bag ? 58 00:03:18,757 --> 00:03:20,198 Thank you ! 59 00:03:22,400 --> 00:03:24,321 They do get things done. 60 00:03:37,011 --> 00:03:37,972 Wow ! 61 00:03:38,653 --> 00:03:40,094 I think I like L.A. ! 62 00:03:40,254 --> 00:03:43,256 I thought you and Chandler should have moved out a long time ago. 63 00:03:43,256 --> 00:03:44,017 It's a very vibrant gay scene. 64 00:03:46,219 --> 00:03:48,340 Chandler and I are not a gay couple ! 65 00:03:50,422 --> 00:03:50,742 Hi ! 66 00:03:53,144 --> 00:03:54,385 Hey ! This is it ! 67 00:03:54,465 --> 00:03:55,626 Your new home ! 68 00:03:59,189 --> 00:04:01,110 Oh my God ! 69 00:04:01,110 --> 00:04:02,912 - Yeah ? - Yeah ! 70 00:04:03,032 --> 00:04:06,474 Gina, thank you for finding this. I love it ! 71 00:04:06,474 --> 00:04:07,916 Good because if you didn't I was gonna lie and tell you.. 72 00:04:07,916 --> 00:04:09,557 .. Tom Cruise used to live here. 73 00:04:09,637 --> 00:04:12,039 Tom Cruise lived here ? 74 00:04:14,441 --> 00:04:15,962 Sure he did, honey ! 75 00:04:15,962 --> 00:04:17,803 Let me show you the best part ! 76 00:04:20,405 --> 00:04:22,007 Check this out ! 77 00:04:22,687 --> 00:04:24,409 Sit up here and lean back. 78 00:04:27,411 --> 00:04:28,372 Look over there. 79 00:04:30,093 --> 00:04:31,614 Is that the middle of the Hollywood sign ? 80 00:04:34,016 --> 00:04:35,938 That is the Hollywood sign. 81 00:04:37,659 --> 00:04:40,061 I can see the Hollywood sign ! 82 00:04:41,502 --> 00:04:43,223 And into that woman's bathroom ! 83 00:04:44,104 --> 00:04:46,506 And now she sees me looking ! Hi there ! 84 00:04:54,952 --> 00:04:55,793 What's the matter ? 85 00:04:56,754 --> 00:04:57,434 I just... 86 00:04:58,315 --> 00:05:00,197 I can't believe I'm here, you know. 87 00:05:00,237 --> 00:05:02,238 It doesn't... It doesn't feel real. 88 00:05:05,961 --> 00:05:07,722 And neither do those. 89 00:05:11,846 --> 00:05:13,767 Gina Tribbiani, hairdresser to the stars. 90 00:05:14,128 --> 00:05:14,808 Stars ? 91 00:05:15,088 --> 00:05:17,410 It sounds better than hairdresser to mostly Dominicans firms. 92 00:05:19,011 --> 00:05:19,812 Yeah, honey. 93 00:05:20,092 --> 00:05:20,853 Come on up. 94 00:05:22,374 --> 00:05:23,935 It's my Michael. He's parking. 95 00:05:24,776 --> 00:05:26,898 Say, what is Michael now ? 20 ? 96 00:05:27,098 --> 00:05:29,780 Yeah, don't I look incredible for the mother of an adult son ? 97 00:05:30,260 --> 00:05:32,102 It's the good thing about having a kid so young. 98 00:05:32,462 --> 00:05:34,383 You rarely hear the argument for a teen pregnancy. 99 00:05:41,469 --> 00:05:43,791 Michael is so excited to see you again. 100 00:05:44,191 --> 00:05:46,673 Oh and by the way, told him I had him when I was 22. 101 00:05:47,233 --> 00:05:48,675 I don't want him to think his mother is a tramp. 102 00:05:54,439 --> 00:05:55,400 Uncle Joey ! 103 00:05:55,520 --> 00:05:57,802 Hey ! Wow ! Man ! 104 00:06:00,004 --> 00:06:02,325 I still think of you as a little kid ! 105 00:06:02,886 --> 00:06:05,007 So much for these wings I picked up on the airplane. 106 00:06:05,288 --> 00:06:06,649 Oh no ! I'll still take them. 107 00:06:07,970 --> 00:06:09,331 I was just gonna show them to you... 108 00:06:13,934 --> 00:06:15,736 Tell your uncle Joey what you've been up to lately ! 109 00:06:16,336 --> 00:06:18,538 Well, now that college's done. 110 00:06:18,618 --> 00:06:21,901 I'm just doing some grad work over Caltech center .. 111 00:06:21,901 --> 00:06:25,143 .. for simulation of dynamic response materials. 112 00:06:25,463 --> 00:06:26,905 Can you believe he came out of me ? 113 00:06:29,106 --> 00:06:31,869 Actually, right now, we're designing a mock-up for an escape module 114 00:06:31,869 --> 00:06:33,790 for the international space station. 115 00:06:33,790 --> 00:06:35,832 What are you a rocket scientist ? 116 00:06:37,233 --> 00:06:38,113 Yes. 117 00:06:39,074 --> 00:06:40,035 Oh. 118 00:06:40,916 --> 00:06:42,437 So how do you like living at school ? 119 00:06:42,717 --> 00:06:43,798 Oh no, I still live with mom. 120 00:06:44,278 --> 00:06:45,199 Oh man ! 121 00:06:47,040 --> 00:06:48,281 That is nice ! 122 00:06:49,923 --> 00:06:51,644 Shut up ! We have fun. Tell him we have fun ! 123 00:06:52,044 --> 00:06:53,485 We do have fun. 124 00:06:53,485 --> 00:06:55,007 We have a lot in common than most moms and sons 125 00:06:55,007 --> 00:06:57,328 'cause she had me when she was just 22, so ? 126 00:06:57,409 --> 00:06:59,050 Yeah, 22, yeah. 127 00:06:59,130 --> 00:07:00,771 That's why we had to change churches. 128 00:07:05,935 --> 00:07:07,376 Michael, where's the lasagna ? 129 00:07:07,977 --> 00:07:09,498 I left it in the car. 130 00:07:09,898 --> 00:07:10,859 I'll get it. I'll get it. 131 00:07:11,139 --> 00:07:14,702 Look at that ! So much going on up here he can't remember lasagna. 132 00:07:14,782 --> 00:07:16,423 We are different you and me ! 133 00:07:18,505 --> 00:07:21,507 So, come on ! What else is going on ? 134 00:07:21,588 --> 00:07:23,709 Well, actually, I'm thinking about moving out. 135 00:07:23,789 --> 00:07:25,350 - Oh yeah, where ? - Here with you. 136 00:07:28,033 --> 00:07:28,793 What ? 137 00:07:28,873 --> 00:07:31,675 I'm 20 years old, man. I shouldn't be living with my mom. 138 00:07:31,755 --> 00:07:33,317 Everyone at school makes fun of me. 139 00:07:33,597 --> 00:07:35,799 And it's not like these are the cool kids, they're not quarterbacks... 140 00:07:35,879 --> 00:07:36,839 engineers ! 141 00:07:40,042 --> 00:07:41,763 But what do you wanna live with me ? 142 00:07:41,843 --> 00:07:44,806 Well, huh, this may not be a big selling point but 143 00:07:44,926 --> 00:07:46,167 I have no money for rent. 144 00:07:48,088 --> 00:07:50,370 And I mean, and also you're my cool uncle Joey, you know. 145 00:07:50,490 --> 00:07:52,412 Living with you, that would just... you know. 146 00:07:52,492 --> 00:07:54,133 Yeah... Break your mother's heart. 147 00:07:55,374 --> 00:07:56,615 I know... I know. 148 00:07:58,056 --> 00:08:00,098 But it's... I mean... It's gonna happen some time. 149 00:08:00,178 --> 00:08:02,379 I just have to get out of there. Have you seen her breast ? 150 00:08:02,500 --> 00:08:04,301 She made me touch 'em ! 151 00:08:12,547 --> 00:08:13,628 Hi ! 152 00:08:16,751 --> 00:08:18,592 Actually not that big of a drop ! 153 00:08:20,354 --> 00:08:22,155 Not your first impression, huh? 154 00:08:22,195 --> 00:08:24,437 Well actually, I got my first impression last night 155 00:08:24,477 --> 00:08:27,159 I saw you are practising your ... judo? 156 00:08:27,239 --> 00:08:30,842 Ah, that wasn't judo. I had a bee on me. 157 00:08:35,806 --> 00:08:38,047 I'm Alex. I live next door. 158 00:08:38,448 --> 00:08:40,329 Really ? I'm Joey. 159 00:08:41,450 --> 00:08:43,091 So, you just moved out here? 160 00:08:43,171 --> 00:08:44,052 Yeah, yeah. I'm from New York. 161 00:08:44,332 --> 00:08:46,294 I'm an actor. 162 00:08:46,334 --> 00:08:49,136 Oh that's so cute. You think it's a big deal to be an actor; 163 00:08:49,296 --> 00:08:51,738 Everyone here is an actor. 164 00:08:51,898 --> 00:08:52,859 What ? 165 00:08:53,019 --> 00:08:54,380 That guy in that apartment... 166 00:08:54,460 --> 00:08:55,181 actor ! 167 00:08:55,301 --> 00:08:55,901 Actor ! 168 00:08:56,022 --> 00:08:56,822 Actor ! 169 00:08:57,062 --> 00:08:58,103 Porn actor ! 170 00:08:58,784 --> 00:08:59,825 Really ? 171 00:08:59,905 --> 00:09:01,426 Yeah. He lives above me. 172 00:09:01,746 --> 00:09:02,747 He's not the best. 173 00:09:04,548 --> 00:09:07,150 So everyone else here is an actor, are you an actor too? 174 00:09:07,310 --> 00:09:10,713 Oh no, actually I am a corporate lawyer. 175 00:09:11,714 --> 00:09:12,635 Wow! What is that? 176 00:09:13,595 --> 00:09:17,799 I represent greedy businesses. I make the world just a little bit worse. 177 00:09:19,840 --> 00:09:21,442 Were you on Days Of Our Lives? 178 00:09:22,122 --> 00:09:24,564 Ah, took you a minute but you recognized me, huh? 179 00:09:27,086 --> 00:09:28,887 I��m wearing my Days Of Our Lives shirt, aren't I? 180 00:09:30,048 --> 00:09:32,330 Yeah, I did the soap thing, but I'm out her to move beyond that. 181 00:09:32,530 --> 00:09:34,932 I'm actually a very serious actor, you know. 182 00:09:35,012 --> 00:09:39,936 Romeo! Oh Romeo! Wherefore art thou Romeo? 183 00:09:41,697 --> 00:09:43,299 That was Romeo. 184 00:09:44,420 --> 00:09:46,541 Actually that was Juliet. 185 00:09:47,662 --> 00:09:48,383 What ? 186 00:09:48,503 --> 00:09:52,586 Romeo wouldn't have started a speech with "Romeo ! Romeo !" 187 00:09:54,347 --> 00:09:57,069 I've done that for like a million auditions ! 188 00:10:01,393 --> 00:10:03,314 Blue walls. Scene C. Take 2. 189 00:10:04,475 --> 00:10:06,277 And... action ! 190 00:10:14,923 --> 00:10:16,365 And... cut ! 191 00:10:21,569 --> 00:10:23,650 I can't believe I'm on a set ! 192 00:10:23,971 --> 00:10:26,372 I think like I could be networking. Let me go talk to the director. 193 00:10:26,853 --> 00:10:29,615 Must be pretty cool seeing your uncle starting his own show, huh ? 194 00:10:29,695 --> 00:10:32,297 Not as cool as it would be seeing my roommate starting his own show. 195 00:10:32,777 --> 00:10:34,899 Michael, about us living... Come on ! 196 00:10:37,501 --> 00:10:39,223 I don't think it's a good idea. 197 00:10:40,383 --> 00:10:41,424 Why not ? 198 00:10:41,825 --> 00:10:44,106 I don't wanna get between you and your mom, alright ? 199 00:10:44,226 --> 00:10:45,547 I can't have her mad at me. 200 00:10:45,547 --> 00:10:46,989 When we were kids, she used to torture me. 201 00:10:46,989 --> 00:10:48,150 She hit me all the time. 202 00:10:48,230 --> 00:10:51,792 She used to hold me down and force me to say "I am gay for David Cassidy". 203 00:10:53,514 --> 00:10:54,474 Who's that ? 204 00:10:54,675 --> 00:10:57,837 David Cassidy from The Partridge Family. Really good looking... 205 00:10:57,917 --> 00:10:58,998 The point is... 206 00:10:59,759 --> 00:11:01,960 I don't want her mad at me, okay ? I'm sorry. 207 00:11:04,843 --> 00:11:06,844 It's okay? I understand. 208 00:11:06,964 --> 00:11:08,005 All right. Good. 209 00:11:08,886 --> 00:11:10,007 You are not gonna believe this ! 210 00:11:10,327 --> 00:11:11,848 The director thought I was an actress ! 211 00:11:12,128 --> 00:11:14,810 Sure, that's because you got big fake boobs and you're crazy ! 212 00:11:23,177 --> 00:11:24,218 I love it out here ! 213 00:11:24,538 --> 00:11:26,540 Sunny and 72 degrees everyday ! 214 00:11:27,020 --> 00:11:28,061 Wonder what it's like in New York. 215 00:11:28,541 --> 00:11:29,302 71. 216 00:11:29,422 --> 00:11:30,383 Poor bastards ! 217 00:11:33,425 --> 00:11:35,667 - Joey ! Hey ! - Hey Allison ! 218 00:11:35,747 --> 00:11:37,388 Allison, this is my sister Gina. 219 00:11:37,468 --> 00:11:38,549 Allison lives here next door. 220 00:11:38,629 --> 00:11:39,390 - Hi ! - Hey ! 221 00:11:39,670 --> 00:11:40,951 You have very beautiful hair. 222 00:11:41,111 --> 00:11:42,072 Thank you very much. 223 00:11:42,272 --> 00:11:44,594 If you ever wanna sell it, give me a call. 224 00:11:46,675 --> 00:11:47,356 Thanks. 225 00:11:50,038 --> 00:11:52,080 I liked that girl, okay ? 226 00:11:52,160 --> 00:11:54,001 Don't be trying to buy her hair ! 227 00:11:54,842 --> 00:11:56,964 She could be the future Mrs. Joey Tribbiani. 228 00:11:57,324 --> 00:11:58,685 Or at the very least the future... 229 00:11:59,085 --> 00:12:00,326 awkward situation. 230 00:12:03,969 --> 00:12:05,290 It's my agent, the shark. 231 00:12:06,451 --> 00:12:07,212 Hello ! 232 00:12:08,292 --> 00:12:09,133 Hi Bobby ! 233 00:12:10,094 --> 00:12:11,455 Right ! And ? 234 00:12:14,337 --> 00:12:15,178 What ? 235 00:12:16,459 --> 00:12:17,219 Why ? 236 00:12:18,380 --> 00:12:21,623 Yeah. Okay. Bye. 237 00:12:23,064 --> 00:12:24,305 My show was dead. 238 00:12:24,585 --> 00:12:25,666 It's not even gonna air. 239 00:12:26,146 --> 00:12:28,148 Oh my god ! Did they say why ? 240 00:12:29,189 --> 00:12:31,431 People thought it was disgusting ! 241 00:12:32,672 --> 00:12:35,434 Geez ! you defecate on one corpse ! 242 00:12:38,596 --> 00:12:40,237 Oh honey. I am so sorry. 243 00:12:40,518 --> 00:12:42,079 I can't believe this. 244 00:12:42,279 --> 00:12:44,080 How can I go from having two shows to... 245 00:12:44,841 --> 00:12:45,802 having nothing ! 246 00:12:47,923 --> 00:12:49,645 You think you should have done the other show ? 247 00:12:50,045 --> 00:12:51,206 The nurses thing ? 248 00:12:51,286 --> 00:12:52,047 Oh no way ! 249 00:12:52,167 --> 00:12:53,488 I mean my thing didn't go but 250 00:12:53,688 --> 00:12:56,570 believe me no one is gonna watch a show about nurses. 251 00:12:57,611 --> 00:13:01,734 I'm here with Sam Baxter, one of the nurses on the new hit show RN. 252 00:13:01,734 --> 00:13:04,617 and, Sam, I'm told that you weren't the first choice for this role. 253 00:13:04,897 --> 00:13:07,899 Well, that's right actually. The producers originally the role to someone else. 254 00:13:08,179 --> 00:13:10,581 An actor by the name of Joey Tribani. 255 00:13:12,102 --> 00:13:15,945 Well, wherever he is, I bet you Joey Tribani... 256 00:13:16,146 --> 00:13:19,108 - is kicking himself. - Tribbiani ! 257 00:13:20,549 --> 00:13:22,951 Joey Tribbiani is kicking himself. 258 00:13:34,280 --> 00:13:35,641 Hey ! What are you doing here ? 259 00:13:35,641 --> 00:13:37,843 I don't know, mom told me you'd be clearing out your dressing room today. 260 00:13:37,923 --> 00:13:40,044 So I figured I'd come by and cheer you up. 261 00:13:40,445 --> 00:13:41,766 What are you cooking ? 262 00:13:41,966 --> 00:13:43,687 Spaghetti and meatballs. It's grandma's recipe. 263 00:13:43,967 --> 00:13:45,689 It always makes me feel better. 264 00:13:46,009 --> 00:13:47,450 Mom made it for me this one time... 265 00:13:47,610 --> 00:13:48,691 this one time I got a B. 266 00:13:48,771 --> 00:13:50,212 I got a B once... 267 00:13:50,893 --> 00:13:52,054 cheated my ass off. 268 00:13:55,977 --> 00:13:57,498 So was today hard ? 269 00:13:57,898 --> 00:14:00,100 Yeah, I can't believe it. 270 00:14:00,380 --> 00:14:02,102 A week ago, I was a star of a show 271 00:14:02,102 --> 00:14:05,384 and now I'm the guy who turned down "nurses". 272 00:14:05,865 --> 00:14:09,507 Which is strange because in real life, I would never turn down a nurse. 273 00:14:11,629 --> 00:14:12,470 So what do you do now ? 274 00:14:12,790 --> 00:14:16,593 I'm meeting with my agent later to try to figure out some kind of game plan. 275 00:14:18,234 --> 00:14:20,436 Hey ! they're making a new Indiana Jones movie. Maybe you can... 276 00:14:20,436 --> 00:14:22,838 Maybe you can... 277 00:14:23,118 --> 00:14:24,199 turn that down. 278 00:14:28,883 --> 00:14:31,485 Feeling more comfortable around your uncle Joey ? 279 00:14:34,927 --> 00:14:37,610 This is really nice. Thanks for doing this. 280 00:14:37,930 --> 00:14:41,292 You know, if you let me be you're roommate, you could have this like everyday. 281 00:14:43,094 --> 00:14:47,137 Michael, look. You're a great kid and I would love to have you as my roommate 282 00:14:47,137 --> 00:14:48,778 but your mother will flip out. 283 00:14:49,139 --> 00:14:49,819 I mean... 284 00:14:54,022 --> 00:14:55,303 You're in ! 285 00:14:58,066 --> 00:14:59,507 No ! No ! No ! No ! 286 00:15:06,632 --> 00:15:09,194 Oh hey Joey ! Have a sit, doll ! 287 00:15:09,675 --> 00:15:11,116 Thanks for seeing me. Listen... 288 00:15:11,796 --> 00:15:14,198 I know we blew it by turning down that nurses thing 289 00:15:14,198 --> 00:15:17,361 but I gotta believe there is something bigger or me right around the corner. 290 00:15:17,841 --> 00:15:21,684 Listen... You are living in a dream world. 291 00:15:23,526 --> 00:15:24,286 Excuse me ? 292 00:15:24,366 --> 00:15:26,208 That nurses show is huge ! 293 00:15:26,568 --> 00:15:29,570 Everyone involved in it is gonna become insanely rich 294 00:15:29,570 --> 00:15:31,852 and is gonna haunt you for the rest of your life. 295 00:15:33,213 --> 00:15:35,495 But my job is to keep up your moral. 296 00:15:37,416 --> 00:15:38,577 I do feel better. 297 00:15:39,938 --> 00:15:40,699 Look... 298 00:15:41,179 --> 00:15:42,701 I'm a straight shooter 299 00:15:43,101 --> 00:15:44,822 but I'll tell you something else about me: 300 00:15:45,102 --> 00:15:47,304 I am the best ! 301 00:15:48,385 --> 00:15:50,747 There is nothing that I wouldn't do for you. 302 00:15:51,227 --> 00:15:52,108 I would... 303 00:15:52,668 --> 00:15:55,270 throw on a meat skirt and wrestle a lion ! 304 00:15:56,231 --> 00:15:59,594 I would pull off my own ears and eat them ! 305 00:16:01,435 --> 00:16:04,197 That's... gross ! 306 00:16:05,078 --> 00:16:07,640 I'm gonna get you through this. 307 00:16:07,840 --> 00:16:13,605 Next year, I am gonna find you a show that'll blow this nurses thing right out of the... 308 00:16:14,846 --> 00:16:16,687 What the hell am I saying ? 309 00:16:16,767 --> 00:16:18,489 Nothing's gonna top that ! 310 00:16:21,851 --> 00:16:24,533 Hold on. Next year ? No, no, no ! 311 00:16:24,653 --> 00:16:26,175 I need to get something now ! 312 00:16:26,575 --> 00:16:29,257 Well, I've got nothing ! 313 00:16:29,457 --> 00:16:32,340 Zilch ! Zero ! Nada ! 314 00:16:33,781 --> 00:16:35,022 There's gotta be something ! 315 00:16:35,222 --> 00:16:38,945 Well, they do need a host for this new entertainment show. 316 00:16:39,145 --> 00:16:40,866 It's not really acting 317 00:16:41,347 --> 00:16:44,629 but it may work since you have such a tremendous head ! 318 00:16:48,913 --> 00:16:49,873 I do ? 319 00:16:49,993 --> 00:16:52,195 Oh come on ! We don't have time for this ! 320 00:16:53,916 --> 00:16:55,278 Thanks Bobby ! Thank you ! 321 00:16:57,199 --> 00:17:00,081 Looks like you got a big barrel on your shoulders ! 322 00:17:09,008 --> 00:17:10,529 Gina! Where have you been ? 323 00:17:10,730 --> 00:17:12,251 My audition is in half an hour ! 324 00:17:12,331 --> 00:17:14,733 Sorry, I'll give you a little trim. It'll take two minutes. 325 00:17:15,694 --> 00:17:17,895 Any sign of my stuff ? Have the movers called ? 326 00:17:18,015 --> 00:17:18,576 No. 327 00:17:18,976 --> 00:17:20,898 Stupid Movers and Shakers ! 328 00:17:22,899 --> 00:17:25,101 I can't be mad at those guys ! 329 00:17:27,983 --> 00:17:30,585 Hey do me a favor. See if you can make my head look a little bit smaller. 330 00:17:34,508 --> 00:17:36,910 I can't do this. I'm too upset. 331 00:17:37,391 --> 00:17:38,151 What's the matter ? 332 00:17:40,473 --> 00:17:41,914 Michael said he was moving out. 333 00:17:42,675 --> 00:17:44,997 Did he say who he was moving in with ? 334 00:17:45,157 --> 00:17:46,798 - No, why ? - Uh... no reason... 335 00:17:48,840 --> 00:17:51,041 But you know if you think about it, Gina, this could be a good thing. 336 00:17:51,121 --> 00:17:54,004 You could have more time for your hairdressing. 337 00:17:54,684 --> 00:17:55,645 Oh please ! 338 00:17:55,925 --> 00:17:57,566 No much of a hairdresser anyway ! 339 00:17:57,726 --> 00:18:00,248 I only started cutting hair because Channel 5 exposed me 340 00:18:00,329 --> 00:18:02,650 as this Southland most dangerous dental technician. 341 00:18:05,533 --> 00:18:07,935 That was some damning footage. 342 00:18:11,457 --> 00:18:13,379 I just don't know what I'm gonna do without him. 343 00:18:13,859 --> 00:18:15,020 He's my baby ! 344 00:18:16,541 --> 00:18:18,463 - Hey come on ! - No, really. 345 00:18:18,863 --> 00:18:20,504 I don't have much to be proud of. 346 00:18:21,345 --> 00:18:22,586 But him, I did right. 347 00:18:27,310 --> 00:18:28,671 I gotta take this. 348 00:18:29,431 --> 00:18:30,072 What ? 349 00:18:30,392 --> 00:18:30,953 Yeah. 350 00:18:31,353 --> 00:18:32,874 I've got a lead on some blond hair. 351 00:18:37,077 --> 00:18:38,719 And some good straight stuff. 352 00:18:42,682 --> 00:18:44,283 Okay, we got a big problem. 353 00:18:44,403 --> 00:18:46,685 I just told mom I was moving out. She went crazy. 354 00:18:46,685 --> 00:18:48,807 I don't know what she's gonna do when she hears I'm moving with you. 355 00:18:49,087 --> 00:18:50,928 Well, let's find out. 356 00:18:53,490 --> 00:18:55,332 Why didn't you tell me she was here 357 00:18:55,412 --> 00:18:57,053 You couldn't tell I was getting a haircut ? 358 00:18:58,214 --> 00:19:00,416 You think I just walk around my apartment in a cape ? 359 00:19:04,059 --> 00:19:04,939 He's gonna live here ? 360 00:19:05,139 --> 00:19:05,780 Are you kidding me ? 361 00:19:05,900 --> 00:19:07,341 Mom, look. This was my idea. 362 00:19:07,341 --> 00:19:08,022 That's true. 363 00:19:08,302 --> 00:19:10,584 Sure, I bet you landed and right away he begged you: 364 00:19:10,704 --> 00:19:12,305 "Please get me away from my mother !" 365 00:19:16,949 --> 00:19:18,950 I cannot believe you would do this to me. 366 00:19:20,391 --> 00:19:21,632 - Gina... - Mom... 367 00:19:21,712 --> 00:19:23,073 - Gina, wait a... - Mom ! - Gina... 368 00:19:25,675 --> 00:19:26,516 Oh my god ! 369 00:19:26,716 --> 00:19:27,877 I know. I know... 370 00:19:30,759 --> 00:19:33,041 I could eat a really big lobster in this. 371 00:19:41,408 --> 00:19:43,810 Okay, Joey. The audition is very simple. 372 00:19:44,370 --> 00:19:45,251 Three cameras. 373 00:19:45,531 --> 00:19:48,694 Each one has a teleprompter beneath the lens and a red light on top. 374 00:19:48,974 --> 00:19:51,095 Whichever red light is lit, that's the camera you address. 375 00:19:51,175 --> 00:19:52,617 The producer is watching from that monitor. 376 00:19:53,577 --> 00:19:55,419 Geez ! Is that a man or a woman ? 377 00:19:55,819 --> 00:19:56,580 And your mike. 378 00:19:58,381 --> 00:20:00,503 Okay. Let's do this. 379 00:20:00,783 --> 00:20:01,464 We have a roll. 380 00:20:01,664 --> 00:20:04,546 Joey Tribbiani audition in 5.. 4... 3... 381 00:20:05,026 --> 00:20:06,347 Welcome to Hollywood minute. 382 00:20:06,548 --> 00:20:07,508 I'm name. 383 00:20:11,431 --> 00:20:12,512 Can I start again ? 384 00:20:12,712 --> 00:20:13,553 Whenever you're ready. 385 00:20:13,633 --> 00:20:14,234 Ok. 386 00:20:16,635 --> 00:20:18,077 Welcome to Hollywood minute. 387 00:20:18,277 --> 00:20:19,398 I'm Joey Tribbiani. 388 00:20:19,718 --> 00:20:21,519 and here are today's top stories. 389 00:20:21,920 --> 00:20:24,682 - Well, even though she's on vacation,... - Cut ! Joey. 390 00:20:24,882 --> 00:20:26,043 You didn't switch cameras. 391 00:20:26,323 --> 00:20:28,165 Oh ! Did the light change ? 392 00:20:28,525 --> 00:20:29,085 Yeah. 393 00:20:29,405 --> 00:20:31,687 Even though you're reading, you need to be aware of when the light changes. 394 00:20:33,409 --> 00:20:34,850 That's really the best way to do this ? 395 00:20:36,611 --> 00:20:39,854 Okay, let's try it again in 5... 4... 3 396 00:20:40,414 --> 00:20:41,695 Welcome to Hollywood minute. 397 00:20:42,055 --> 00:20:43,296 I'm Joey Tribbiani. 398 00:20:43,497 --> 00:20:45,338 and here are today's top stories. 399 00:20:45,498 --> 00:20:50,782 Well, even though she's on vacation, Jennifer Lopez is in the news today. 400 00:20:50,982 --> 00:20:52,824 More on that story later. 401 00:20:53,104 --> 00:20:56,547 But first, let's check out the box office returns for this weekend. 402 00:20:56,827 --> 00:20:58,668 Topping the list for the third week in a row... 403 00:20:58,668 --> 00:21:00,590 Man! That is one fast red light ! 404 00:21:00,590 --> 00:21:01,431 Topping the list... 405 00:21:02,031 --> 00:21:02,992 Topping the list... 406 00:21:04,313 --> 00:21:05,594 I know it's not that one. 407 00:21:06,555 --> 00:21:07,595 Where the hell is it ? 408 00:21:08,276 --> 00:21:10,197 Okay, Joey. Thanks for coming. 409 00:21:10,278 --> 00:21:11,919 No, no, no. I'm getting the hang of it. 410 00:21:11,999 --> 00:21:14,521 Please, Mr. or Mrs. producer. 411 00:21:14,681 --> 00:21:16,923 I need this job. I can do this. 412 00:21:17,203 --> 00:21:19,004 - You're looking at the wrong camera. - Damn it ! 413 00:21:20,245 --> 00:21:22,767 Romeo ! Oh Romeo ! 414 00:21:33,896 --> 00:21:35,057 - Hey ! - Hey ! 415 00:21:35,697 --> 00:21:36,578 What's wrong ? 416 00:21:37,739 --> 00:21:42,463 I... I just blew an audition to host this stupid entertainment show. 417 00:21:42,503 --> 00:21:44,745 - Was that even acting ? - No ! 418 00:21:44,865 --> 00:21:47,707 It's just following a really fast red light. 419 00:21:48,628 --> 00:21:52,030 I'm sorry. 420 00:21:57,435 --> 00:22:01,878 If we are both bumped, would you wanna maybe go and grab a bite to eat ? 421 00:22:01,998 --> 00:22:05,241 Oh I wish i could, but I gotta go to the airport and pick up my husband. 422 00:22:07,162 --> 00:22:08,003 Oh... You're married ? 423 00:22:08,964 --> 00:22:11,085 You didn't know? Didn't you see the ring? 424 00:22:11,165 --> 00:22:15,208 Yeah, I saw a ring but it's not on your left hand. 425 00:22:15,889 --> 00:22:17,330 Yeah, it is. 426 00:22:20,132 --> 00:22:21,133 If you say so. 427 00:22:30,861 --> 00:22:31,902 hey 428 00:22:32,262 --> 00:22:34,263 Did you know that girl next door is married ? 429 00:22:34,464 --> 00:22:37,906 I can't talk to that girl, she... she makes my stutter come back. 430 00:22:41,069 --> 00:22:42,030 Can I talk to you ? 431 00:22:42,310 --> 00:22:44,351 Look, Michael, if we?e gonna be roommates, you should know 432 00:22:44,351 --> 00:22:46,553 there are gonna be times when I'm not gonna wanna talk, 433 00:22:46,633 --> 00:22:48,755 I'm just gonna wanna eat the spaghetti you made for me. 434 00:22:49,996 --> 00:22:55,000 Well, actually, I'm not gonna be your roommate. 435 00:22:56,321 --> 00:22:58,362 What ? Why ? 436 00:22:59,043 --> 00:23:01,245 I don't know... I talked it over with my mom and she is... 437 00:23:01,325 --> 00:23:02,686 Oh Michael ! Don't listen to her ! 438 00:23:02,766 --> 00:23:04,287 She's a selfish, crazy... 439 00:23:04,607 --> 00:23:06,409 Okay, we need a signal for when she's here. 440 00:23:08,330 --> 00:23:09,211 Come on, Michael. We're leaving. 441 00:23:09,291 --> 00:23:10,732 Gina, this is nuts. 442 00:23:11,212 --> 00:23:12,734 He's a man, okay ? 443 00:23:12,934 --> 00:23:14,655 He's graduated college. 444 00:23:14,855 --> 00:23:15,616 He shaves. 445 00:23:15,936 --> 00:23:16,977 He sleeps with women. 446 00:23:17,738 --> 00:23:19,099 I... I do shave. 447 00:23:20,420 --> 00:23:22,341 Come on ! You have to let him go ! 448 00:23:22,741 --> 00:23:23,702 Oh yeah ? 449 00:23:25,984 --> 00:23:28,506 You can hurt me all you want, he's gonna move out some time. 450 00:23:28,666 --> 00:23:30,027 Not if I can help it. 451 00:23:30,107 --> 00:23:31,869 Look, Gina, I know he's your baby 452 00:23:32,029 --> 00:23:33,470 but it's time to move on. 453 00:23:33,590 --> 00:23:34,831 Change can be good. 454 00:23:35,031 --> 00:23:37,233 - Oh it's easy for you to say ! - No, it's not ! 455 00:23:37,713 --> 00:23:38,474 No ! 456 00:23:38,954 --> 00:23:39,435 Look... 457 00:23:40,956 --> 00:23:44,318 Nobody understands wanting things to stay the same like I do. 458 00:23:44,438 --> 00:23:45,479 I was happy in New York. 459 00:23:46,240 --> 00:23:48,922 Okay ? And I tried really hard to keep things from changing. 460 00:23:49,042 --> 00:23:52,965 But everyone else got married and had kids... and moved on. 461 00:23:53,045 --> 00:23:54,006 They all changed. 462 00:23:55,647 --> 00:23:58,329 So... I'm giving change a shot. 463 00:23:58,930 --> 00:24:00,651 And it has been hard. 464 00:24:02,373 --> 00:24:06,416 But.. just hoping things stay the same... 465 00:24:07,176 --> 00:24:08,137 it doesn't work. 466 00:24:12,260 --> 00:24:13,902 You're smarter than you used to be. 467 00:24:17,264 --> 00:24:18,785 I don't know where that came from. 468 00:24:26,071 --> 00:24:27,432 You know he's a slob, right ? 469 00:24:27,913 --> 00:24:31,555 You know how you like everything nice and clean and in its own little place. 470 00:24:32,396 --> 00:24:34,438 There's gonna be sauce on everything you own. 471 00:24:35,879 --> 00:24:37,320 I don't know how it happens. 472 00:24:40,362 --> 00:24:42,204 Mom, that's okay. 473 00:24:47,968 --> 00:24:50,250 If this is really what you want... 474 00:24:50,931 --> 00:24:52,572 Thank you, mom. Thank you. 475 00:24:55,254 --> 00:24:56,975 I'm just gonna miss you. That's all. 476 00:24:57,856 --> 00:25:00,458 It's been the two of us for such a long time. 477 00:25:00,618 --> 00:25:02,660 Well, now it's the three of us. 478 00:25:02,940 --> 00:25:04,461 You gave your speech... Enough ! 479 00:25:08,304 --> 00:25:09,665 You sure you're gonna be okay ? 480 00:25:09,745 --> 00:25:11,187 Gina, he's gonna be fine ! 481 00:25:11,267 --> 00:25:12,548 He's old enough to move out ! 482 00:25:12,908 --> 00:25:14,949 You were raising a kid when you were 16 ! 483 00:25:21,354 --> 00:25:23,396 How did I not figure that out ? 484 00:25:25,598 --> 00:25:26,078 I mean... 485 00:25:26,158 --> 00:25:28,840 I took calculus when I was 8 ! 486 00:25:30,562 --> 00:25:31,362 You're dead. 487 00:25:31,442 --> 00:25:33,364 Gina, back off. I don't wanna hurt you. 488 00:25:33,644 --> 00:25:34,325 Oh yeah ? 489 00:25:37,007 --> 00:25:39,128 I'm gay for David Cassidy ! 490 00:25:40,305 --> 00:25:46,300 Support us and become VIP member to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org